is this it??? 08/21/2009
Lately, I've been waking up without my morning mood, instead a smile paints my face and it is the effect of the happiness inside me. I've been talking to someone who gives me this happy vitamin, which keeps me going everyday.
The first few days we were chatting, i was enjoying myself. i wasnt thinking of other things...just pure simple, clean fun. then i started looking forward to chatting with him... the mere sound of my handphone beeping for a message excites me....more, when i see the message was from him. i know it's too HS-feeling but somehow, it feels good. i said to myself, get a grip. i dont flirt with him like i used to, but i find myself easily opening up to him. for some weird reasons, i became more honest to someone, more honest than with my ex actually, to think we're not an item. i sometimes slap my face to wake up to reality that we're miles away and it's never gonna happen. but still, i have a smile on my face...darn!
days passed and everyday keeps gettin better, happier, we get to know each other a little at a time... very nice feeling. for the first time, someone asked for my photo. well i gave him more than your fingers in hand... each of which has a story behind, and i tell him about it one by one. Every time we have to cut our conversation, there's a certain pang inside me, wanting more...wanting to ask where he was going, what time he will be online again, but i tell myself to stop. I dont want to get used to this feeling - it will hurt me in the future if things wont work out, despite of our promise... i need to be more prepared, more protective of myself and more vigilant of things that will happen. somehow i cant let my guards down for the fear of getting myself back on the road where i was before him.
im not closing my door, nor am i scratching the idea i have in mind. i just dont want to rush into things this time. I cant afford it anymore.
but the thing is, i keep on questioning myself of what i am truly feeling...
im not on the rebound, that im certain...
but why am i feeling this way?
is this it?
i want to know....
im done with it... 05/26/2009
been into relationships.. not much coz it lasts years... ive always tried to fight for these relationships to work out... i tried up to the last thread....ive always believed that you should try to do everything you can before giving up... fighter, i am, if that's how you call it.... now im meeting guys...eligible bachelors, others - complicated... but none of them comes close to what i am looking for....
Love Will Find Me Again 05/09/2009
Waking up alone
When Will It Be Me? 05/09/2009
I see the couple are walkin` by
On preparedness 04/23/2009
The house is very tidy. On the table was set a platter of Martabak, Chicken Sate with peanut sauce, and a bowl of hot Chicken Macaroni Soup. Everything was set for the dinner, the chance to introduce "doc" to my mom. My chance too to have "the talk" with him. The night when it will all start to be clearer when it comes to status. My ever supportive-gaga-lovable-root of this meeting-sister, rowan was, of course, ever present. Doc came in a few minutes later than the set time. It was fine as we entertained ourselves with a single round of Magic sing Karaoke session. Dinner was lovely, funny, entertaining, informative and all that. It went well, except for something. Since he was an on-call doctor, time was never definite. He had to go back to the hospital. Even when it was pouring hard outside, he still went, protected by my Nike jacket, which by the way he casually asked for and of course, willingly I gave in. He knew I needed to talk to him but call of duty comes first before everything. His exit left me thinking about a lot of things.
Anong Meron sa mga Pangit? 04/22/2009
Sabi ko nga madalas sa mga malapit sa akin, lahat naman tayo maganda eh, depende nga lang kung sino ang katabi mo o natabi sa 'yo.
When will it be me? 04/11/2009
I attended Lius' birthday surprise party. Really a surprise, because the boyfriend was supposed to fly that morning but made up that excuse to hide the real surprise... he threw the party for Lius. The pool party was at HIS house, he BAKED the birthday cake (which was really great, btw) and you can really see that he made sure everything was set. Boyfriend is really handsome, from a well-to-do family, smart, witty, kind, cool, OMG, it's like everything you can ever ask for... Lius is one lucky girl.... haaaaayyyy....
Social Contracts 04/10/2009
The basic idea seems simple: in some way, the agreement (or consent) of all individuals subject to collectively enforced social arrangements shows that those arrangements have some normative property (they are legitimate, just, obligating, etc.). Even this vague basic idea, though, is anything but simple, and even this abstract rendering is objectionable in many ways. To explicate the idea of the social contract we analyze contractual approaches into five variables: (1) the nature of the contractual act; (2) the parties to the act; (3) what the parties are agreeing to; (4) the reasoning that leads to the agreement; (5) what the agreement is supposed to show.
Long Weekend 04/09/2009
Well after 3 days at work, I have a long weekend to kill...there's an election today and Good Friday tomorrow.... im planning on working on the yearbook as i wasnt able to touch it during the term break as planned :D.
Im back at work. Wi fi sucked almost the whole day in school until after 3pm. So here I am nang hahamig ng libreng wi-fi wahahahaha. I feel better, now that i got to see my kids again, got plenty of hugs from them, played with paint without limits (hehehehe) just pure enjoyment...check out all in a day's work page for some pics...de -stressing for me, fun for my kids ;).
Work has always been my shield to whatever personal thing i have. Work is the only valid reason i have not to entertain the ill-feeling in my heart. Somehow being at work makes me feel needed, important and appreciated. In school, i can feel the love from my kids, giving me that extra kick to get out of bed & put myself together knowing that they need me too. My kids have always been my best shield from me breaking apart. Love you my